Comedy Meets Cyberpunk Meets WordPress
Welcome to the beautiful disaster that is Zero Cool—a comedy series where WordPress literally runs everything important and the people protecting it are barely holding it together.
What’s This All About?
In our world, nuclear plants, air traffic control, and banking systems all run on WordPress. Plugin updates break at the worst possible moment. Enterprise security is just shared hosting with an SSL certificate. And the only thing standing between civilization and chaos is a sleep-deprived vulnerability hunter who really just wants to be left alone.
Zero Cool is a comedy-first cyberpunk series that finds humor in the gap between how technology should work and how it actually works. It’s about incompetent people managing critical systems, the absurdity of modern web development, and how the most important infrastructure is held together by digital duct tape and prayer.
Who Are We Writing For?
If you’ve ever:
- Watched a critical update break everything at 3 AM
- Discovered your “enterprise solution” is three plugins in a trench coat
- Wondered why the nuclear plant’s login page has a “Powered by WordPress” footer
- Experienced the unique terror of seeing “1 plugin needs updating” on a production site
Then this series is for you.
Meet the Disasters
Zero Cool – Our chronically sleep-deprived protagonist who keeps accidentally developing a conscience. Master of finding vulnerabilities, terrible at avoiding responsibility.
Cipher – The only adult in any room, trying to maintain professional standards in a world where “chmod 777” is considered a security solution.
The Architect – Delivers valid security grievances with the drama of a Shakespeare villain. They’re not wrong, they’re just theatrical about it.
Why Should You Care?
Because somewhere out there, a nuclear plant’s cooling system depends on a contact form plugin maintained by someone named Steve who hasn’t logged into GitHub since 2019.
Because “It works on my machine” isn’t a valid deployment strategy, but it’s the one we’re all using.
Because sometimes the only way to process the existential terror of modern technology is to laugh at it.
What You’ll Find Here
- Genuine Comedy: Character-driven humor that emerges from real situations we’ve all faced
- Technical Accuracy: Real WordPress vulnerabilities and practical solutions wrapped in absurdist scenarios
- Quotable Disasters: From “Your blockchain is showing” to “Security through obscurity is just hide and seek for adults”
- Educational Entertainment: Learn actual security concepts while laughing at digital catastrophes
The Mission
To create comedy that makes WordPress security accessible, celebrates the beautiful disasters of web development, and reminds us that behind every critical system is a human who’s probably googling the error message.
Join the Chaos
New episodes explore everything from impostor syndrome meeting the Dunning-Kruger effect to the unique horror of inheriting someone else’s custom theme. We’re accidentally saving the world, one WordPress disaster at a time.
Because in a world where everything important runs on WordPress, someone has to keep the plugins updated.
It might as well be funny.
Zero Cool: Where comedy, cyberpunk, and WordPress collide in beautiful, terrifying ways.